Quotes to live by...

"And even if somebody else has it much worse, that doesn’t really change the fact that you have what you have."

— The Perks of Being A Wallflower

Quotes to live by...

"Home wasn’t a set house, or a single town on a map. It was wherever the people who loved you were, whenever you were together. Not a place but a moment, and then another, building on top of each other like bricks to create a solid shelter that you take with you for your entire life, wherever you may go."

— Sarah Dessen, ‘Whatever Happened to Goodbye’

Dating

I don't "get" dating I guess... Maybe it's because i've been out of the loop for so long, I don't know... I had been casually seeing this guy for a couple months... Here and there lunch dates, nothing too serious, just hanging out... Well I went to a wedding with him a week and a half ago and NEVER heard a word out of him after that... I logged onto Facebook this morning only to see that he's changed his "Relationship Status" to "in a Relationship with" ...a girl that wasn't me... So I guess that's the end of that.

Quotes to live by...

"People are always blaming circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can't find them, make them."

— George Bernard Shaw

Happy Birthday Marine Corps!!!

Two hundred and thirty six years ago today, the United States Marine Corps was born in a tavern in Philadelphia. While that may seem an odd place, those who know Marines understand that it could be no other way.

Marines have served around the world defending their country. Every war, conflict, "police-action" or simple show of force has had Marines leading the way. Today Marines serve around the world in two theaters of war, embassies, ships and even at the White House.

Happy Birthday Marines

Quotes to live by...

"I always find it more difficult to say the things I mean than the things I don’t."

— W. Somerset Maugham

Gotta love Marine's

... injuries he sustained when he "slipped and fell" off the curb?!?  HaHa, yeah right! ...You fall off a curb and you get a twisted ankle, maybe a couple bruises... Not two broken arms, a broken ankle, a broken leg, missing teeth, broken ribs, multiple contusions, lacerations, a broken nose and broken jaw... Gotta love Marine's!

Crazy school policies.

Substitute Kindergarten Teacher: "We have a new pick up policy, parents can no longer enter the class room, we find it too  distracting, we need you to just knock on the door and wait for the teacher to answer it, and please do not speak to the teacher, save all questions for parent-teacher day, if the classroom door is open, please stand in the doorway and wave your arms"  Wow, way to maintain a completely impersonal relationship with the parents.

Well this is clearly not working out for me, because even after picking lil'bit up, we had to make 4 trips back into class because the sub 1, wouldn't let me in, and 2, didn't send her out with all her stuff... Trip 1 to get her homework, a 2nd time to get her back pack, a 3rd time to get her lunch box which is for some reason never in her back pack, and a 4th time to locate her water bottle which manages to to MIA almost every day... Even after all that, we got to the car and I realized she didn't have her sweater... At that point I just left it, figured I'd get it the next day... But really, I'm pretty sure just letting me walk into the class and get all her stuff would be far less distracting than going back in 4+ more times.

Quotes to live by

Marine Corps Ball Protocol

With Marine Corps Ball season coming upon us I found a need to make a post about it... I've been getting A LOT of comments and questions about attending Marine Corps balls lately... First and foremost I should point out that every ball is different. Not only will the way the Navy handle their balls differ from how the Marine Corps does theirs... But even balls differ from Marine unit to Marine unit. None the less I still compiled what tend to be general guide lines across the board...

Dress:

• Most important point is don't dress like a skank. (See Post: What NOT to wear to military balls)
• Most places, full length gowns are the norm. 
• Never go above the knee.  
• Don't wear a corsage or glitter (This is not your high school prom)

Demeanor:   

•  Don't get hammered.  
• Your behavior and appearance reflect on your serviceman. 
• See Post: What not to do at the Marine Corps Ball! 
  
• Pay attention to what is going on around you. 
• Stand whenever the wives at the head table stand during the ceremony. 
• Keep your mouth shut and LISTEN during the ceremony. 
• Whispering is rude!

What to expect:

• See Post: Rundown of schedule of events 

Background research:

• History of the Corps 
• Emblem & Seal 
• Semper Fidelis 
• Marine Corps Hymn 
• Marine Corps Flag 
• The Marine Corps Prayer

Quotes to live by...

Southern Pumpkin Pie Milkshake

Ingredients: (Makes 1 Shake)

     1 cups vanilla ice cream

     1/4 cup milk

     1/8 cup cream or half and half

     1/2 tablespoon vanilla extract

     1/3 cup pureed pumpkin

     1/4 tablespoon pumpkin pie spice

     2 tablespoons graham cracker crumbs

     2 ounces of bourbon

 Optional: 

     Whipped Cream
     Cinnamon

 

Add all ingredients to a blender and mix until combined. 

Pour in shake and top with whipped cream if desired and sprinkle cinnamon on top

Rundown of Marine Corps Ball

Cocktail hour 

(Time to mingle with Marines and their dates and to have your pictures taken by provided photographers). 

Usually not an open bar and drinks tend to be over priced. Most Marine's bring their own flask.

10 minute call

The Narrator will make an announcement 10 minutes prior to the start of the ceremony for everyone to start finding their seats. This is a last call to get your drinks or use the restroom because you will be locked in the banquet hall for around 2 hours. (yes, they'll make exceptions for those who can't hold it for a couple hours)

5 minute call

The Narrator will make an announcement 5 minutes prior to the start of the ceremony for everyone to take their seats. The band will take their positions, the color guard and all involved in the ceremony will take their spots.

Seating

Seating at most Balls is assigned. Sometimes table numbers are listed on the tickets themselves but usually there will be a manned table at the back or just outside the ball room, if you give them your name they will be able to tell you what table you are sitting at, and then you can look up the corresponding number on the seating chart (usually propped on an easel near the table). Make sure you find the seating chart and your table prior to the 5 minute call.

The Commandant's Message
After everyone is seated, the narrator will welcome all guests and read the Commandant's message. Five minutes tops.

Prayer 

The narrator will ask that everyone stand while the chaplain leads prayer. I want to make a point and say that i've seen people remain seated during this time, no one cares what religion you are, or if you believe in the God that the chaplain is praying to, regardless of your faith, you stand, and bow your head out of respect.

Adjutants Call (This might be hard to follow if you haven't been to a ball, I'll try to use lamins terms)

When the chaplain in done, the narrator will ask that everyone remain standing. The band will sound "Attention", all Marine's in uniform will snap to "position of attention" (heals together, feet in V shape, arms strait and to the sides). The band will play "Adjutants Call" and you will see "Escorts" (Marine's in dress blues) march down the aisle and stop, a couple feet from each other, turn and face the aisle itself. The band will play "order arms" at which point all escorts will pop their riffles up across their chests and all other Marine's in uniform (Your date) will salute in the direction of the door way. At this point all those not in uniform (yes this is you) should stand tall and place your hands to your side or clasped in front of behind you. (Meaning, don't stand there with your hands on your hips or arms crossed)

The Colors are marched forward along with the guest of honor and distinguished Marines. When the colorguard comes to a stop, the band will play the National Anthem and the Colors will be posted (place your hand OVER your heart, fingers together). The band will play order arms again and you may drop your hand, but remain standing. The colorguard will march around a bit, and present the Marine Corps flag, at which point the band will slowly play the Marine Corps Hymn. You will hear the majority of the Marine's around the room singing, but non-Marine's need to resist joining in on this catchy tune... Non-Marines (Wives, Girlfriends, other dates) did not earn the right. When the Hymn is over you may hear grunts, barks, Oorah's, please try to not start laughing, the ceremony isn't over yet. After the Hymn they'll roll the cake out at this time, and FINALLY, you can sit down.

Cake Cutting Ceremony

An adjutant (usually some higher up) will read Gen.Lejeune's birthday message (Marine Corps Order 47, dated 1 Nov 1921). The narrator will introduce those sitting at the head table and will read the guest of honor's biography. At this point the oldest and Youngest Marine will come forward (towards the cake cart previously rolled out), there will be a passing of a sword and the cutting of the cake. The narrator will announce this all as they go, but they give the first piece of the cake to the guest of honor... And then this is the fun part... They announce the birth date of the oldest Marine present as they hand him a piece of cake, then as he passes it to the youngest Marine present (symbolic of passing traditions of the "Old Corps" to the "New Corps") they will announce the youngest Marine's birthday and then laughter and grumbles ensue as everyone in the room realizes how old they are getting.

The cake escorts remove the cake from the room and everybody will stand as they retire the colors (march the flags out of the room). After the Adjutants march out of the room everybody may be seated again.

POW/MIA/KIA Ceremony 

Your attention will be directed to a small table at the head of the room with an empty place setting. Everything on that table is a  symbol and the narrator will go over each individual meaning. It is to the utmost important that you remain completely silent out of respect to those who have given the ultimate sacrifice for YOU! After a moment of silence a toast will be given, usually very somber and not followed by the cheerful (Oorah, barks and applause).

State of the Corps (usually after the POW Ceremony, sometimes after speeches, and sometimes shown during dinner)

At this point, most commands will choose to show a "State of the Corps" video, usually narrated by Gary Sinise or R.Lee Emery. It usually lasts 10-15 minutes.

Speeches

The narrator will re-introduce the guest(s) of honor and they will take the podium. If you're lucky, you'll have a really engaging guest of honor. I've seen some speeches last as short as 5 minutes, and some as long as 45. All conclude with a toast the the unit and the Marine Corps (Make sure you have a drink handy). You will also need to stand up and applaud when the guest is done speaking (standing ovation).

Retiring of the Colors

At this point, in the same procession that entered the room, the colorguard and escorts will leave the room. You will of course need to stand, yet again, for this.

Parade of Uniforms (sometimes commands omit this altogether)

The parade of uniforms is the time to "parade" uniforms of Marine's past and present, starting with the Revolutionary War and working up to Afghanistan. One by one, a Marine wearing a replica uniform will make his/her way down the aisle and give a short speech on that war. This is usually pretty entertaining as most Marine's will give their own spin on the speech (or low crawl down the aisle). On a side note, Towards the end of the parade, the Corpsmen will be honored (FYI, when the Corpsmen are honored, even through they are Navy, the Marine's owe them much respect and usually a standing ovation is given, follow in suite).

Blessing

The narrator will ask that everyone remain standing while the chaplain gives a short blessing for the food. Once again, regardless of your faith, you stand, and bow your head out of respect. It's literally a 30 second prayer, it won't kill you.

Conclusion

Once the colors are out of the room, and the chaplain is done, the narrator will make a statement to the equivalent of "Ladies and Gentlemen, this concludes our ceremony. Enjoy the Ball." Remain seated until a ball coordinator takes the stage and lets everybody know how they are to receive dinner.

Dinner

Some balls choose to do buffet style catering. In cases like this, the ball coordinator will dismiss table by table as to not have everyone standing in line at the same time. If they are doing a plate (seated) service, you may get up and use the restroom or get a drink at this point, but make sure to leave your dining card (where you choose if you want beef, chicken or vegetarian) at your place setting so the server knows which plate to give you.

Dancing

After dinner, the CO (or narrator) may say a couple word (IE: Thanks for coming, please don't drink and drive, see the back table for an "arrive alive" card, etc.) The DJ will starts to play and that's when the good times start.

Each Ball will have its own flow and some have a traditional uniform viewing during the Ceremony, or, as in the past few years, a long video about the "State of the Corps," that is shown Marine Corps wide. It just depends. The Ceremony usually lasts about one hour, but I've seen it go on for two hours.

What not to do at the Navy Ball

Posted by Bacon on October 12th, 2010 filed in Broadside moments

Tomorrow is the Navy’s 235th birthday. It is the perfect time to celebrate the accomplishments of our venerable service.

We often do this at Navy Balls. 

Navy Balls are great because we get a chance to get dressed up and revel in being a part of a great naval force that has kept the sea lanes open and the country safe throughout the history of the nation. But there are pitfalls to avoid. Do not throw dinner rolls. It is rude and obnoxious. Unless you have a clear shot, in which case it may be difficult to resist. Eat dark colored food, since you will be wearing your blues. If you must eat light colored food, try to spill it only on your white shirt, preferably in a location where you can cover it with a tie. Don’t tell jokes at the dinner table. And if you do, don’t tell the one about the Admiral on liberty. (Especially relevant if the Admiral is sitting at your table.) There is just no way to be glamorous while doing jello shots.If they parade the beef, don’t shout, “That’s my DATE!” (This applies to men and women.) If someone offers to buy your table a round of “Mudslides,” it is OK to accept, but only have one. They taste great, but pack a powerful punch. Two tops. Maybe three. But that’s it. Maybe four.Do not dance unless you have had formal training. And if you do, stick with ballroom dancing, avoiding any of these moves unless you can actually do them (which I doubt), and only after your boss has left for the evening.Toasts should be limited to military themes. (Sergeant Pepper is not a military theme. Neither is Major Tom.) No matter how badly the evening’s events proceed, do not complain out loud. Unless, of course, you really want to be next year’s Navy Ball coordinator. But odds are the evening will be a great success and you’ll leave with a ton of great memories.Unless you had that fourth Mudslide, in which case you won’t remember much of anything.Happy birthday, Navy!

Quotes to live by...

"It is only my memory that holds me here. Time, let me vanish. Then what we separate by our very presence can come together."

— Audrey Niffenegger, The Time Traveler’s Wife

Questions to ask yourself...

Repealing DADT is not practical for the Marine Corps

While repealing the Don’t Ask Don’t Tell policy may be feasible for the Army, Air Force, and Navy, homosexuality is not compatible with the Marine Corps. Marine’s are not only expected to uphold specific standards, but are required to live by certain “Marine Corps Core Values”. Honor, Courage and Commitment become a way of life for Marine’s, but where does homosexuality come into play with values? When defining “Honor” The Marine Corps states “Marines must possess the highest sense of gallantry in serving the United States of America and embody responsibility to duty above self, including, but not limited to: Integrity, Responsibility, and Tradition” (Marine Corps Values) “Demonstrating respect for the customs, courtesies, and traditions developed over many years for good reason, which produce a common Marine Corps history and identity. Respect for the heritage and traditions of others, especially those we encounter in duty around the world.” (Marine Corps Values). Those traditions that do not revolve around conforming to a homosexual life style are the staples to the very Marine Corps ethos.

Those proud traditions that were instilled upon those joining the Marine Corps, are the same traditions that will prevent current service members from being about to fully conform to a repeal of the current policy. “The potential exists for disruption of the successful execution of our current combat mission should repeal be implemented at this time, in addition to compromising combat effectiveness, repealing DADT would also threaten unit cohesion and combat readiness, if the law is changed, successfully implementing repeal and assimilating openly homosexual Marines into the tightly woven fabric of our combat units has strong potential for disruption at the small unit level, it will no doubt divert leadership attention away from an almost singular focus of preparing units for combat” (Gen. James Amos, the Marine Corps commandant) “Marines bring with them when they enter the Corps their own set of Core Values. Personal Core Values are instilled in Marines by their parents, families, religious beliefs, schools, peers, and other influences upon their lives. These individual sets of values may be strong or they may be weak. Regardless of background, every Marine should understand that being a Marine entails embracing and adhering to Marine Corps Core Values.” (Marine Corps Values) Being a Marine requires sacrifice across the board. It is not the Marine Corps’ job to conform to society, but rather those few brave men and women who choose to join the “few and the proud” to conform to the Marine Corps.

Ready or not, here it comes...

Did you hear? As of midnight the Don't Ask Don't Tell policy is no longer in affect... Marine Corps Times article gave details the end of the Don't Ask Don't Tell policy. (I really encourage you to look into the details on this)

In short, the article goes on to say that the problem is that the Pentagon has failed to meet a variety of regulatory requirements written into the repeal law, including delivering to Congress copies of revised regulations and a summary of all policy changes, “especially with regard to benefits,” that will take place upon repeal... The Defense Department “is not ready to implement repeal because all the policies and regulations necessary for the transition are not yet final,” the lawmakers wrote... But not all policy changes related to repeal, including potential changes in benefits... Some benefits are specifically intended for a “spouse,” and the federal Defense of Marriage Act precludes the military, for now, from extending those benefits to same-sex partners. The best example is family housing.

An exhaustive Pentagon report on the effects of lifting the ban recommended strictly prohibiting any special bathroom, berthing or billeting assignments based on sexual orientation, even on ships and in other forward-deployed settings. Still, commanders retain the authority to alter berthing or billeting assignments on a case-by-case basis in the interest of maintaining morale, good order and discipline. As money allows, the services may improve privacy measures, such as installing curtains. But troops “must understand that the mission frequently demands operations in austere conditions where privacy is not a concern to operational planning,” the report says.

Quotes to live by...

"So many people enter and leave your life. Hundreds of thousands of people. You have to keep the door open so they can come in. But it also means you have to let them go."

— Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close; Jonathan Safran Foer

Attention!

At 1130 PST, Marine Cpl. Dakota Meyer will receive our nation's highest honor, the Congressional Medal of Honor! Cpl. Meyer will be the first Marine to receive a Medal of Honor for actions in Afghanistan, and the first living Marine recipient of the award since now-retired Sgt. Maj. Allan Kellogg received the medal from President Nixon, for actions 41 years ago in Vietnam.

(Stars and Stripes) When Marine Cpl. Dakota Meyer plunged into Afghanistan’s Ganjgal Valley, he was sure he wouldn’t come out alive, Meyer said in a USA Today article.

Dakota Meyer, the first living Marine to receive a Medal of Honor for actions in Afghanistan, will be honored with the award at a White House ceremony Sept. 15. Meyer’s team, along with other U.S. military advisers and Afghan forces, was pinned down near a village in Kunar province.

Meyer wasn’t going to wait and see whether they would get out. Defying orders to stay put, Meyer set himself in the turret of a Humvee and rode straight into the firefight, taking fire from all directions. He went in not once, but five times, trying to rescue his comrades.

During about six hours of chaotic fighting, he killed eight Taliban militants and provided cover for Afghan and U.S. servicemen to escape the ambush, the USA Today reported, citing a Marine Corps account of the events. Meyer saved the lives of 13 U.S. troops and 23 Afghan soldiers that day, Sept. 8, 2009.
Next week, President Obama will award him the Medal of Honor, the nation’s highest medal for bravery. During the ceremony Sept. 15, Meyer will become the third living recipient of the Medal of Honor for actions in Iraq and Afghanistan.
Meyer, who joined the Marines almost on a lark, said in an interview with USA Today at his grandparents’ Kentucky farm that what he did was an easy decision to make.

“My best friends were in there getting shot at,” he said.

Quotes to live by...

Wordless Wednesday

Sent from my T-Mobile myTouch 3G Slide

Payless Military Discount!

I just got an email from Payless that's I'm super excited about. So show their support for the troops (and their family's) Payless will not be offering a 10% discount on your entire purchase,including sale and clearance item!

The fine print says: Discount offer valid for U.S. Military personnel and their qualified dependents who present their valid Armed Forces ID. Armed Forces ID must be presented at time of purchase. The 10% discount is taken off of the current retail selling price of any full price, sale or clearance items. Not valid at Shopko® and www.payless.com.

Healthy Home

Last year, for both environmental and health reasons, I vowed to eliminate plastic water bottles in our home. Seemingly easy you'd think, but not so much for a family on-the-go where summer temps reach triple digits on a daily basis. Alas, I made the switch to reusable stainless steel, which I begrudgingly clean and refill nightly.

This year, my gift to the earth (and my family) was recycling all expired medicines. I spent one morning collecting a large plastic bag of pills and trotted it down to the pharmacy. The pharmacy clerk looked at me like I was crazy.

She told me that I was the first to ask about safely disposing medication and furthermore, the pharmacy can’t accept expired pharmaceuticals. Huh? It was Kaiser, the largest HMO in the nation, and you’re telling me that the pharmacy doesn’t have a disposal system for medication?

Hmm. I wasn’t buying it and after a few more minutes, she remembered seeing something about safely disposing medicine and emerged with a special TakeAway mailer. Really, can’t I just recycle it at the hospital’s pharmacy? The kicker is when she announced, “That will be $5.” Are you kidding me?!?

While I have clearly not achieved pure natural diva status (yet), I am forever looking for simple solutions to tread a little lighter on the Earth. After reading The Healthy Home by Dr. Myron Mentz and his son Dave Wentz, I’m inspired to do more not only for the earth, but for my family’s health.

"Almost overnight, a toxic world has been built around us, slowly manipulating how we eat, sleep, work, play…how we live."

The Healthy Home is full of practical and simple solutions for reducing health risks posed by everyday products and behaviors of the modern family. Here are a few of my favorite tips for a healthier home:

• Bedroom: Make sure your body is wrapped in safe, natural material at least 1/3 of the day (or all night). Buy organic cotton pajamas and bedding.
• Kitchen: Buy yourself an air popper and ditch the microwave popcorn. Microwave bags are lined with a Teflon coating, known to release hazardous fumes and particles.
• Laundry Room: Use ½ cup white vinegar in place of fabric softner in the washer to reduce static cling and soften clothes. (Note: never mix bleach with vinegar.)
• Living Room: Open a window whenever you can to let in fresh, cleansing air. Outside air quality is surprising (and significantly) cleaner than inside air quality.

Quotes to live by...

"If adultery happens in 41% of marriages, if the guy next door is hiring prostitutes, if Brett Favre’s penis scored nearly 2 million views, it’s not the politicians that are the problem, it’s Americans, who sit in turned-on judgment of those who dally sexually while doing so themselves, who dream of getting off in the same way but don’t allow themselves to do so, who devote their work days to looking at the latest leaked cell phone pics of genitals that belong to someone more famous than themselves.

Americans are fascinated by political sex scandals because the politician is doing what Americans are doing but won’t admit, or what they wish they were doing but won’t say, and Americans, rather than confess their natural tendencies or sexual fantasies, would rather criticize those political figures who there, but for the grace of God, are doing what Americans wish they were doing."

— Susannah Breslin

Wordless Wednesday

Goodies from my garden

Two, cucumbers (even they kinda look like zucchini).

Two, beefsteak tomatoes.

Six, Cherokee purple tomatoes.

I think I should have a couple bell peppers tomorrow, and maybe another two beefsteak tomatoes by the end of the week.

On a side note, check out how big this Cherokee purple was! The freakin size of a sharpie. (Don't ask me why I chose a sharpie to compare it to, it just happened to be within reach) ...I wish I had a sale though, it was totally solid and pretty heavy.

Target Trip

$3... No joke.

Herbashine (hair dye), FREE
Men's and Women's deodorant, both FREE

Sweet Potato Fries, FREE

I got the soymilk for $1.50

Veggie dogs $1 and some change.

Where does your Food Come From?

I have been thinking a lot lately about food. Well, lets be honest, its not just lately that I have been thinking about food. Me and food - we like each other. I love preparing food. I love cooking for people. I love how so much of life revolves around food. Celebrations. Festivals. Social engagements. Rituals. If you have never made this connection, just decide to fast for a week and you will quickly see how often our thoughts revolve around food and how often things we do with our family and friends revolve around eating.

So, yes, me and food - we are kind of like BFF's.

Here is my question:

Do you know where your food comes from?

Wordless Wednesday

Sent from my T-Mobile myTouch 3G Slide

Quotes to live by...

"Do not bring people in your life who weigh you down. And trust your instincts … good relationships feel good. They feel right. They don’t hurt. They’re not painful. That’s not just with somebody you want to marry, but it’s with the friends that you choose. It’s with the people you surround yourselves with. And that’s just as important as the school that you choose. Who’s in your life, and do you respect them, and do they respect you? And are you respecting them" 

— Michelle Obama

Guess what!?!

We just got our 100th follower! 

Woot Woot!

Seriously, thank you all for following this blog for the past 4 or however many years it's been up and running.

Birth Plans

When I was pregnant with Lil'Bit, I had no idea what I was doing and when people would ask me what “my birth plan” was, I would say, “Umm.. I plan to have a baby,” and then I’d walk away because those people were clearly idiots, but then later I was reading the pregnancy books and apparently you’re supposed to have a detailed plan for the kind of birth you want your child to have. You’re supposed to decide how you want to deal with the pain, where to have your baby, what part of your body you want your baby to come out of, and a host of other things that all basically sound like various degrees of unpleasantness and horror.  

If you’re anything like me, the baby books and your pregnant friends will scare the shit out of you so I’m going to give you the lowdown here. 

You will have a million choices in your birth plan but only three things are certain.

One: You’re doing it wrong:

         If you have your baby at home, it will scar your other children for life and your baby may be trampled by wild horses.
         If you have your baby at a hospital, it will get switched with another baby who leaves the door open all the time and sells your VCR for drug money.
         If you have an epidural, your baby will come out addicted to crack.
         If anyone speaks to the baby for the first seven days, they will have psychic scars that will allow aliens to latch onto their brains.

Two: IT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT DECISION YOU WILL EVER MAKE. 

         Choosing a birth plan is less like choosing a new couch and more like choosing whether to be in the Crips or the Bloods. Battle lines are drawn and someone’s going to get blood on them. 

Example:

         Me: Once the baby’s born I’m going to become a cannibal.

         Pregnant friend: Oh, like the Atkins diet. Good for you!

         Me: Also, I’ll be dyeing my clothes with the blood of my enemies.

         Pregnant friend: Well, you do look good in red.

         Me: And I think I’ve decided to have a c-section.

         Pregnant friend: SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH AND LEAVE NOW BEFORE YOUR SELFISH BREATH INFECTS MY UNBORN BABY.

Three: The person making your actual birth plan decisions is your baby. 

         Newsflash, babies don’t give a shit about your plans. Making a plan for the birth of a child is like making a plan for decorating your Christmas tree in the middle of a house fire. Until you’re actually in the heat of battle, you have no idea whether you’re going to want drugs or whether you’ll have to have a c-section or whether you’ll be stuck in traffic and the baby will be delivered by a cab driver who will burn off the umbilical cord with his cigar. And that’s fine. Hell, the Virgin Mary had her baby in a damn barn and he turned out okay. 

         In the end, none of that matters. Whether you welcome your baby in a hut or in a hospital or in the orphanage where you adopt her, the same basic rule applies: If you’re lucky enough to end up with a baby, you win.

Wordless Wednesday

99 cent Pregnancy Test

I'm sure this pregnancy test is no different than the $20 one you buy at the drug store... But something about seeing this at the 99 Cent Only store made it just FEEL that much less reputable.

Did you know we're on Facebook?!?

I kinda became a slacker about promoting Facebook lately, but I checked our page on there and we only have 42 followers, while on here we have a while 99...

If you wouldn't mind "liking" our Facebook page, as well as suggesting it to all your friends, we would be so very grateful.

http://www.facebook.com/WifeMomBlogger

Disneyland Birthday Celebration

I think I had intended on posting something about this in May after we spent my daughter's 5th birthday at Disneyland, but it ended up slipping my mind. Anyways, so the So.Cal. locals (or those planning on making a trip to SoCal on or around a birthday) below are some ideas and options to make your Birthday celebration at Disneyland a magical one!

Starbucks Frappuccino Cheat!

I had a friend send me a Frappuccino recipe from MoneySavingMom, which I immediately tried and LOVED! This is bound to become a daily afternoon treat of mine!  ::drool::

Homemade Frappuccino Recipe

• Ice
• 1/2 package of Jell-O Instant Pudding, any flavor
• 1/2 cup strong brewed coffee (For a little more of a Starbucks flavor, add one package of Via instant coffee instead of liquid coffee.)
• Milk (any kind — almond, soy, whole, non-fat)

Fill Magic Bullet tall cup with ice and add half a package (approximately 2 1/2 tablespoons) of your chosen pudding. Add coffee and top with milk (it should reach brim of cup).

Place the Magic Bullet cross blade lid on cup, put onto Magic Bullet base and blend to desired consistency (until you don’t hear the ice crushing anymore).

Top with whipped cream if desired, and enjoy! If it looks too thick, there should be room for a little bit more milk. Stir and pack down what you have now, and add milk to the brim of cup. Blend for five seconds more.
1. Fill Magic Bullet tall cup with ice. (You can purchase a Magic Bullet for $49 at Wal-Mart.)

2. Add half a package (approximately 2 1/2 tablespoons) of your chosen pudding.


3. Add coffee.

4. Top with milk (should reach brim of cup).

5. Place Magic Bullet cross blade lid on cup, put onto magic bullet base, and blend to desired consistency, until you don’t hear the ice crushing anymore.
6. Top with whipped cream if desired, and enjoy!
 
*If it looks too thick, there should be room for a little bit more milk. Stir and pack down what you have now, and add milk to the brim of cup. Blend for 5 seconds more.

Using the above directions, I usually get a very smooth, thick but drinkable-through-a-straw texture. With all the money you’ve saved, you can afford to splurge on a reusable Starbucks cold cup, if it feels a little more luxurious to drink out of an actual Starbucks cup!

The whole calorie aspect of this aside,  which in my opinion makes the hassle of making your own frapps worth it (not that this is a hassle by any means) ...But do you have any idea how much money this could save you?

Two Grande Starbucks Frappuccinos a Week (at $4.15 each): $431.16 per year

Two Homemade Frappuccinos Each Week (at $0.50 each per drink): $12.00 per year!

Total Savings the first year: $419..16!!!

Mom-isms

When you first become a parent, you’re often bombarded with quotes on motherhood and child-rearing and some of them are very helpful, but more often than not they are so out-of-date that it’s difficult to understand what they even mean. That’s why I’ve taken 20 of the top parenting quotes and tacked on a bit at the end to make them slightly more contemporary.

 

You’re welcome!

“Always kiss your children goodnight -- even if they're already asleep.” That way you can make sure they’re still breathing and haven’t turned onto zombies during the night.

“Mother knows best.” Unless she’s trying to get you to commit arson for her. Then it might be a good idea to leave home. But first maybe take some notes. It never hurts to know a little bit about arson.

“A mother has eyes in the back of her head.” In the form of a nanny-cam implanted in your childhood teddy bear on your shelf. 

Get off youtube and get back to work!

By now you surely have heard and/or seen footage of the soldier who asked Mila Kunis to the Marine Corps Birthday Ball. Alright, it was pretty funny when Justin Timberlake maneuvered her into and corner and basically made it impossible for her to say no to an invitation to the Marine Corps Ball.

And it was still okay when a female Marine seized the day, called Justin out and got herself a dream date of her own. But now it's starting to get a bit ridiculous, a third Marine's asked Miley Cyrus, to one of the balls at Pendleton... And even worse when Sgt. Ray Lewis to create yet another video, asking Betty White to the November event... Ok, come on now, you'd think maybe the kids would get the hint that this is getting old... But no. Sgt. Dustin L. Williams followed it up by creating a YouTube video inviting Scarlett Johansson to a ball in Georgia... In which she politely declined.

20 Things you probably shouldn't say to your child...

Last week CNN ran a story called "9 Things You Shouldn’t Say to Your Child." Personally, I was surprised that they could only think of nine, but I assumed that I could guess them all without even reading their post. So I wrote down my list of things that I thought you should never say to your kid and turns out their list of prohibited things included stuff like “Don’t be sad” and “Great job!” My list included things like, “Of course you can go play with those bears” and “Why don't you hitchhike? It would totally be cheaper. ” I suppose CNN and I will just have to agree to disagree on this one. But while we’re on the subject, I’d like to share with you my list of things you probably shouldn’t say to your child. (Feel free to add your own in the comments.)

Rock Climbing

So proud of my little one...

Rock climbing at Adventure City yesterday on a school field trip.

P.S. She just turned 5 a couple months ago.

Wordless Wednesday

Whole Grain Energy Bars

Here is a fun, easy recipe for granola bars that pack a real nutritional punch! They are portable, delicious, and will keep your kids full and naturally energized (they're not loaded with icky stuff like so many store-bought bars)! The recipe can be adapted any number of ways to make your family happy. Swap out different types of nuts... add dried fruit... omit the chocolate... just have fun with it! And don't forget to get the kiddos involved. They can help measure out ingredients and stir!

Ingredients:
2 cups old fashioned oats
1 cup raw nuts (we like a combo of almonds, walnuts & cashews)
1/2 cup raw seeds (try sunflower & pumpkin)
1 cup shredded coconut
1/2 cup ground flaxseed
1/3 cup natural peanut butter
2/3 cup honey
3 Tbsp. unsalted butter
2 tsp. Vanilla extract
1/4 tsp. ground cinnamon
pinch of course salt
1 cup dark chocolate ships or chunks

Directions:
Preheat oven to 300 degrees.

Line 13x9" baking pan with foil or parchment paper (for easy removal), and butter all sides.

Toast oats, nuts & seeds, and coconut on a cookie sheet in the oven until golden brown, about 15 minutes.

Meanwhile, bring peanut butter, honey, butter, vanilla, cinnamon, and salt to a simmer to a small saucepan. Reduce heat to low.

Transfer toasted mixture to a large mixing bowl, and add the flaxseed.

Carefully pour the wet mixture into the bowl, and stir until fully combined; incorporate the chocolate chips.

Transfer mixture to the prepared pan, and use the back of a spoon to pack it in really well.

Bake for 30 minutes. Cool in the pan for a few hours, then cut into bars and enjoy!

Quotes to live by...

"Imperfection is beauty; madness is genius; and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring" 

- Marilyn Monroe

Hot

...No literally, it was 98 degrees!

Crap my B.R.A.T. Says

"Can I tell you something?...
Unicorns fart rainbows that smell like cinnamon."

Related

I saw this on Perez Hilton the other day...



Truth be told, when I started researching mine and my ex's family trees (we were married at the time)... I found out that we were actually related as well! My grandpa on my dad's side was born in West Virginia, and my ex's Great-Grandma (oh his mom's side) was also from West Virginia... And wouldn't you know it... So was Barbra Bush! HaHa. So, supposedly Barbra Bush (Bush Sr's wife) is my 3rd cousin once removed... And she was also my ex's 4th cousin, two or three times removed (I can't remember now) ...So that would make us what, 7th cousins, 3 (or 4) times removed? I'm not sure how the math works there... But still. Like Kyra said, "It was a little upsetting, I'm not gunna lie".

Crap my B.R.A.T. Says

Lil'Bit: "Mia told me her dad thinks you're kinda cute."

Me: "Aww, really?"

Lil'Bit: "Yeah, but I told her that her dad was wrong. You're the most beautifulest mom in the whirl'd." 

Me: "Aww! Thanks! That's soooo sweet!!!" 

Lil'Bit: "Can I have some candy now?"

Zhu Zhu Pet deal!

There's a MEGA Zhu Zhu Pet sale going on right now at CVS... All... And I mean ALL Zhu Zhu Pet products are $2 EACH!!! As advertised in Sunday's CVS add, All Zhu Zhu Pet Hampsters or accessories, 5/$10 with card! This is definitely what I would consider a “stockpile” price on Zhu Zhu pets, these would make great birthday or Christmas gifts. 

On the Go Hotel  ($24.99)

Add-On Room 3 Piece Assortment  ($24.99)

Drive-Through Overpass ($24.99)
Beauty Salon ($24.99)

Babies Push-a-Long - Robin ($14.99)

Hamster Hangout ($12.99)
Zhu Zhu Pets Hamster ($9.99)

Zhu Zhu Babies ($9.99)

Sub Total: $147.92
Total With Card: $16.00
ECB: -$3 

GRAND TOTAL: $13 (!!!)

Seriously all that -->

for only 13!!!

Here's the catch... Some stores aren't marking them the sale price, but it's in the add, so all CVS's must honor it... Some stores, like the two I went to this morning, they rang up only 50% off... The first store I went to, they refused to honor the sale price (didn't have it posted either), so I left, the 2nd store I went to did have the price listed as 5/$10, and did a price change and gave them to me for $2. Just make sure you ask, and show the add if need be. The offer is valid through July 23rd, but supplies are going fast so I suggest you head down to your local CVS today to take advantage of this awesome deal!


Looking to save even more?!? If you plan on spending $20 or more at CVS, you can sign up for CVS's Extra Care Emails where you will receive a coupon for $4 off a $20 purchase!

A Natural Cleansing Spray to Clean Non-Organic Fruits & Veggies

There is a new book out that is such a great resource for moms who are wanting to implement a more healthy, "green", sustainable lifestyle for their families.  It is called Gorgeously Green, and it is written by Sophie Uliano.  This is one of the helpful ideas that I LOVED in this book:

If you can't buy organic produce (try to whenever you can! It is worth the extra cost), you need to make sure you wash it thoroughly. -The pesticides that have been sprayed on the fruits & veggies repel bugs because it kills bugs...it is not a good thing for us to consume them either.  Pesticides and herbicides are linked to cancer, parkinsons disease, and more...

Use this spray to make sure your fruit and vegetables are squeaky clean.

INGREDIENTS
1 cup water
1 cup distilled white vinegar
1 Tbsp. baking soda
20 drops of grapefruit seed extract (available at health food stores)

Combine all ingredients in a large container. Then, transfer to a spray bottle with a pump. Spray mixture on produce, and rinse thoroughly after 5 to 10 minutes.