Thursday, November 26, 2009

Happy Tofurkey Day!

So as I have my Thanksgiving Tofurkey in the oven baking away, I had to send a little Thanksgiving blog out... Now I have to admit, although Tofurkys taste wonderful, they look rather bland. Mr. Kevin Forbes, my newly minted vegan Thanksgiving hero, has offered an awesome solution to jazz that cruelty-free center piece of yours up!! And in the wonderful vegan tradition of sharing and vegan awesome wonderfulness, he has made a template (with complete directions) for everyone to print out and decorate their Tofurkys with! I think this is just too funny and am heading upstairs to print mine out right now. I can't wait to see the look on my husband's face when I bring the tofurkey to the table this year.

The holidays are always rough for us vegetarians. Most of the year, we get by well enough on our lentils, rice and Indian food. But whenever North American families get together, a turkey dinner is inevitable. And with the dinner, come the questions: “Don’t you miss steak?” “How do you get your protein?” Blah blah blah.A good way to avoid a lot of the hassles of the season is to get a Tofurky. It looks like a ham, tastes like a turkey (kind of), and is made entirely out of plants. With a slab of Tofurky on your plate, you can blend into the background of any extended family dinner. It’s like vegan camouflage!

But sometimes, that’s not enough. Sometimes, in the presence of so much carnivorousness, something primal is stirred. You see meat. You smell it. The caveman hunter wakes up inside of you, and you go on the prowl. In times like these, vaguely meatish soy product is not enough! You need...

... a Tofurky Disguise Kit! That’s right! By following these simple instructions, you can assemble a convincing disguise for your Tofurky, or other meat analogue. In a matter of minutes, your pretend turkey log will resemble a living, breathing, wild turkey! Then, you can hunt it, kill it, and fight your old man for the neck!

Here’s what you’ll need to assemble your very own Tofurky Disguise Kit!
1. Tofurky Disguise Kit Template
2. 8.5” by 11” card stock or bristol board
3. Toothpicks
4. Scissors, tape, and a gluestick

Assembly Instructions:
Download and print out the template. You can print it in glorious full colour, or even in gritty black and white to create a mysterious Film Noir effect.

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